Relationship Rules!!

Lick the Alphabet!

Flowers are good but jewelry is better.

When you go out to eat don't order for your girl. It's cheesy.

When I talk look at my eyes, not my chest.

Kissing me for 10 minutes will get you further than an hour of playing with my boobs.

Romantic dinners at home are better than expensive dinners out.

I'm not as interested in your car as you think I am. Don't talk about it unless I ask.

Yes, I will go to the sporting event with you. But you'll owe me a chick flick later.

Back rubs make me want to rub you back.

It's only OK to look at another girl if I look at her first and point her out.

When I say I'm "fine" it means I'm "Freaked out, Insecure, Neurotic and Emotional".

If you like what I do in bed it's best not to ask where I learned it or how I got so good.

If you've never given me roses don't bother asking about chocolate syrup.

If it has a drive thru it's not fine dining.

Before you give me an old picture of yourself make sure the other girl is completely cropped out.

No, a grown woman with teddy bears is not silly. And I always want another one.

Having a holiday dinner with my parents will get you further than you think.

Know where to get a cheeseburger at midnight. You may need to some day.

If you want to know what I fantasize about read a romance novel instead of Playboy.

Foreplay counts. Learn it. Love it. Live it!

Just because I did it on your birthday it doesn't mean I'll do it again.

Heavy metal is not romantic music even when they do sing about loving their "chick."

If you want to sleep next to me when we get home you will too hold the purse.

Yes, I will help you wash the car. No, I will not wear a bikini to do it.

Do you really want me to pose in a men’s magazine? Remember your buddies will see it too.

Don't believe what your friend says. I know her. She does NOT do that for him.

There is good crying and bad crying. You need to hold me when I do either one.

It's always good to bring me a box of chocolates. Try not to do it when I’m dieting.

I don't mind you watching me when I work out. But get rid of the snacks.

When we're in the shower wait until I finish shaving my legs before you grab me.

When I don't wear panties it's sexy. When you don't wear underwear it's gross.

There is no such thing as a hot, sweaty, sexy man.

If you take me to a strip club, don't complain when I get tips.

Taking me shopping is a better choice than taking me 4-wheeling.

Don't worry that I didn’t eat the burnt chicken. I'll still give you a special "thank you" for cooking for me.

Buying me lingerie is a present for you. Buying me shoes is a present for me.

My father does not appreciate your sexual innuendos.

Just accept it. The football jersey is my pajamas now. You're not getting it back.

If they're that important, you get the implants.

I don't care that there's no other cars on the road. Not while you're driving!